


All I Ever Wanted

by Jhonni



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hannibal Cre-Ate-ive, Hannibal Loves Will, Hannibal has Feelings, Hannibal to the Rescue, Hannigram - Freeform, ItsStillBeautiful, Jealous Will, Kissing, M/M, Post-Canon, Post-Episode: s03e13 The Wrath of the Lamb, Romance, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Will Loves Hannibal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-11
Updated: 2016-08-11
Packaged: 2018-08-08 01:27:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7737907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jhonni/pseuds/Jhonni
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For Hannibal Cre-Ate-Ive's #ItsStillBeautiful event</p>
<p>
  <i>“Why haven’t we ever talked about Alana?”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Will’s words were a pebble dropped into the silence. Hannibal’s knife tapped on without a hitch. He’d grown accustomed to questions at odd moments. As if Will’s mind was constantly churning. A new one would bob along the surface, tantalizing until Will couldn’t resist.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>It was part of their new intimacy, Hannibal supposed. Thrust into shared quarters. Long months of recovery with little to do but stare at each other. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Uncertainty. A feeling Hannibal shared more than he would ever let on. Someone had to keep the boat from drifting off course. Whatever that course might be. Forward was enough.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>He reached for a handful of basil. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“I imagine you’ve avoided the subject because you’re loathe to bring up my promise to her.”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Your promise to kill her.” Will tasted the sharpness after. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Hannibal’s answer clicked into place. “That promise.” </i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	All I Ever Wanted

“Why haven’t we ever talked about Alana?”

Will’s words were a pebble dropped into the silence. Hannibal’s knife tapped on without a hitch. He’d grown accustomed to questions at odd moments. As if Will’s mind was constantly churning. A new one would bob along the surface, tantalizing until Will couldn’t resist.

It was part of their new intimacy, Hannibal supposed. Thrust into shared quarters. Long months of recovery with little to do but stare at each other. 

Uncertainty. A feeling Hannibal shared more than he would ever let on. Someone had to keep the boat from drifting off course. Whatever that course might be. Forward was enough.

He reached for a handful of basil. 

“I imagine you’ve avoided the subject because you’re loathe to bring up my promise to her.”

“Your promise to kill her.” Will tasted the sharpness after. 

Hannibal’s answer clicked into place. “That promise.” 

This was the way most of their conversations went. The days of deflecting were behind them. Near-death experiences tend to rearrange one’s priorities. Time wasted is time lost.

Will moved into Hannibal’s line of sight. Stretched against the counter, he watched Hannibal’s hands. The confidence with which he held the knife. He could picture a thin, red line on Alana’s neck. Flesh splitting. The slow motion fall to the ground. Invisible fingers stroked over his scar.

“Did you have feelings for her?”

Hannibal took a moment to appreciate Will’s forced, casual look. Not his best effort. The constant tension had taken its toll on both of them. Shields worn thin.

“I considered her a friend for a time. But I expect that’s not what you’re asking.” 

_Not the kind of friend whose kiss sent me running to tell someone._

A challenge stretched between their eyes. There was no shame in retreat. Question asked. Answer given. 

Will had passed the line of rational thought already. The urge to press was outside him now. Pushing from behind. 

There’d been times when he wanted to shake Hannibal just to see his expression change. He considered himself lucky to manage even a veneer of restraint. 

Whatever he expected after the fall, it wasn’t this. There should have been more of a transformation. Not that he had any regrets. No matter what he called it, it was better than the lie that came before. 

He told himself silence wasn’t the same. Not yet an omission until he was sure of his feelings. 

Hannibal waited for return fire. Their stillness cast a shadow over the kitchen. Will’s skin pricked with a charge in the air. Hostility looking for a place to land. How could he be angry with Hannibal after Molly. Margot. His own history with Alana. 

He never wanted to kill any of them. 

Did he actually resent Hannibal for turning his violent attention towards someone else?

A cold sweat bloomed. He wanted to hit Hannibal. Knock him to the ground and not stop until he was forced to fight back. The knife was still in Hannibal’s hand. The sight of it was a shockwave, teasing Will’s cock awake. He had to get away before before he did something that couldn’t be undone.

Will’s lips pressed in a line. “You don’t need to elaborate.” He moved to a drawer and began noisily collecting the silverware. 

Dinner was a silent affair. Will ate as much as was polite before excusing himself without offering to help clean up. 

It was the first time since the fall he didn’t say good night.

* * *

The house was empty by the time Will stumbled into the kitchen. Hannibal had probably gone to the market. The one with no surveillance cameras was a good distance away. 

The coffee was still hot. A plate of biscuits warm under a kitchen towel. Will stuffed one down, bent over the sink. It was too quiet. The sun did little to chase away the ghost of their conversation. 

Hannibal’s presence was everywhere. Guilt crowded Will’s thoughts. He should have said good night.

Skipping the shower, Will threw on some jeans and his boots. The house stood in the shadow of a tree line. He never asked when or how Hannibal came to own it. Not knowing gave him the luxury of imagining that Hannibal had him in mind. 

The future was built on sand. These little stories were all he had. The past was too open to interpretation.

_Is Hannibal in love with me?_

_Could he daily feel a stab of hunger for you, and find nourishment at the very sight of you?_

Bedelia. Another of Hannibal’s conquests. How could Will trust anything she said?

The chill of the woods eased some of Will’s hollowness. It was the one place he didn’t feel like a guest in someone else’s life. He never wandered very far. The leash was there. Soulmates wasn’t a concept that had ever resonated. Even now it was a frail thought. But something kept him coming back. 

It was the loneliest Will had ever been. Playing the good husband was easy by comparison. 

Will rounded the bend where the trail turned rocky. Hannibal was probably home by now. No doubt he’d let the subject drop. He always did. Will wished just once he wouldn’t. 

Alana was the wrong button to push. Jealousy might scratch an itch, but it would only amuse Hannibal. Will needed to see him break. God forbid he just ask. 

“Will?” 

The voice could have come from inside his head. But it didn’t. 

Hannibal looked just as startled as Will felt. Embarrassed. There was only one reason he’d be here - alone in the woods. The claustrophobia was getting to him too. 

Will’s eyes darted away when he realized he was staring. It felt like an intrusion. Like seeing each other naked. Shoving his hands in his pockets, he shifted his weight. His thoughts turned to static.

“I should get back,” Hannibal said.

_Go. It’s not as if I could stop you._

Bitterness burned Will’s throat. He didn’t trust his voice. A nod sent Hannibal on his way. Will followed his movements until he was out of sight. 

That’s when the panic hit. He couldn’t breathe. A kick to his heart brought him to his knees. His thoughts spiraled into darkness. Doubt. Rejection. What if it never meant anything? What if he was wrong? Where would he go? What kind of life was left after this? After Hannibal.

Tears stained Will’s face when he finally made his way back. He kept his footsteps light, heading straight for his room. No sounds came from the kitchen. No smells. Just as another wave of panic swelled, he heard Hannibal’s door click shut. 

Only a wall separated them. Will could see Hannibal’s hand pressed against the glass of his cell. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. 

Curled around a pillow, he let the sobbing take him. He cried for the dogs. For himself, for being a fool and a coward. He cried for the man on the other side of the wall. 

* * *

The dull throb of a headache roused Will from sleep. His body stiff from clutching the pillow. The sound of water running brought a sense of dread. 

Hannibal was in the kitchen. Will couldn’t avoid him forever. 

The sky was already turning dark. He couldn’t help but picture Hannibal’s face when he left the dinner table the night before. Will promised himself he’d keep it light. The less said the better. A drink would help. Anything to avoid a repeat performance. 

The tile was cool on his bare feet when he stepped into the kitchen.

“Hannibal?”

Will’s breath seized at the sight of him. Smeared with mud, hunched forward. A stunned look when he turned from the sink.

“Will. I thought you were sleeping.” Hannibal tried to collect himself. Uncharacteristically failing.

A whine came from outside the screen door. Cautiously, Will approached, feeling Hannibal’s eyes on him every step. His heart climbed into his throat.

_Fuck._

There were no words. Nothing could have prepared him. 

_You got me a dog._

Rubbing a towel over his hands, Hannibal came close as Will stared, rooted to the spot. The dog gave a rough shake. Water sprayed as its collar jangled. Wide brown eyes looked back at the door. 

“We can fix the yard up for him. Something better than that rope. I thought I had more time before you woke up. I got him a bed for your room too.”

Hannibal’s voice floated around Will. He could feel his smile. The warmth of his presence. Tears brimmed in Will’s eyes. He opened his mouth to speak but only silence came.

Fondness melted into Hannibal’s tone. “Oh, Will.” 

The touch on Will’s cheek reached in and squeezed his heart. He’d never seen Hannibal tremble. Never imagined him at a loss for words.

Slowly, the pieces shifted into place. Will reached into Hannibal’s eyes. Searching. His voice thin. As unsteady as his legs.

“Is this what you were doing in the woods?”

Hannibal pursed his lips as if he was afraid of what might come out. Brushing a tear from Will’s lashes, a sigh shook free. “I’ve been trying to get him to warm up to me enough to bring him home. I know you’re missing your pack.”

The ground shifted beneath Will’s feet. “Hannibal …” 

“He likes biscuits.” Hannibal sniffed.

Will’s laugh was joy itself. Sunshine. Breathless, he pulled Hannibal close. 

“I miss you more.”

“Will …”

_I miss you so much._

A soft hush fell on Hannibal’s lips. “Stop talking and kiss me.”

Time collapsed into a single moment. Hannibal’s lips pressed against his. Will felt the fall. The air rushing up. 

He wasn’t afraid. After so long, he finally felt safe.

“You know I love you.” 

Will threw himself into Hannibal’s arms, surrendering to tears that wouldn’t stop. 

“I love you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> Visit me on Tumblr at [lecteronthelam](http://lecteronthelam.tumblr.com/)


End file.
